Silver State News Editor Menaced, then Booted from Reno Awards Banquet; Accused by RARA President & CEO Mike Houghton of "Lying to Readers" ("Mr. Kettle, Mr. Pot on Line 2!") and "You're Not A Reporter!"

Editor Replies:

"That's Okay! You're Not An Air Race!"

At least it was honest -- in a sense. Things sure have hit the fan since the start of the races.

Just the same, the community was troubled by the wording. Some in this family community, known more for its extroverted gambling image than for its quiet, sensible family values, suddenly questioned what "it" meant and exactly "what" was going to hit the fan.

Oh, but that was half the fun! A radio commercial that aired at the same time indicated the dangers of a pilot crashing his racer at some ungodly speed, then invited folks on out to watch the crashes.

The Reno Air Races...just waiting to become a professional Air Racing event.

Analysis of Action Finds Development of Tricky Good News/Bad News Scenario:

Bad News: Second Veteran Booted by RARA in 2003!

Good News: Three More Veterans Booted and Houghton will be an Ace!

Yes, Virginia, there is an Air Race Nazi. He's alive and well and lives in the upper recesses of a hangar at Reno-Stead Airport, Nevada. He also tends to travel in packs. He wears a headset and a plaid shirt. Drives real fast on the ramp. His bestest friend in the whole wide world is a guy named "Thug."

Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but I sure had an interesting evening at the Reno Air Race Championships Award Banquet...roughly ten minutes spent there in total.

I was there to provide photography for the Precious Metal Air Racing Team as they accepted their trophy for winning the Bronze Race at Reno in 2003. I run the Team's website and provide photography for them as part of a pre-existing agreement with Team Owner Ron Buccarelli, which pre-dated the current RARA/Parker dispute.

Needless to say, Silver State News Service is not covering this year's event, nor any other year's from here on out, until RARA changes their ways and starts treating these pilots and others with respect. John Parker, in particular. He's "this year's target" of abuse by the non-profit corporation established for the public benefit to "preserve Air Racing."

Due to my stance in support of Parker and against RARA, I fully expected to be booed and hissed when I went in there. Quite the contrary, for nine of those ten minutes. Had a number of friends and pilots greet me, shake my hand, wish me well and give me those big smiles that the Best of the Best in Air Racing are known for. Those who met me there and did just that know whom I'm talking about.

So, I'm looking for Ron all over the place while trying to catch up with Naomi West, whom I saw enter the hangar, when I run into Chris Patton over by the awards stand. He too, is looking for Ron and the Team, and about all I can say is that "I haven't seen him...I'm looking for him too." Chris walks away and as I go to take his photograph, he turns and gives a funny look. I shoot the shot, and in that moment, I hear a voice behind me saying: "I thought you weren't covering this event."

I turn around and there's Mike Houghton. I shook his hand and said "I'm not...I'm chronicling and archiving the event." There's no less than four guys with him. Three behind him and one to his left (my right). Houghton starts in lecturing me that I was out there "covering the event" and that he respected the fact that I took a stand and that I supported John Parker, but he did not respect the fact that I was -- in his words, not mine -- "covering" the event when I told my readers that I "wouldn't be covering" the event.

I reiterated, "I am not covering the event. I am here to chronicle and archive the event and I am covering the Precious Metal Air Racing Team." Houghton tried to speak but that individual off to his left (my right) interrupted with an extremely hostile:

"Why don't you get the fuck out of here!!??"

Mike, you brought me hoodlums. How sweet!

I gave Mr. Hostility a rather bored look that I'm sure he's probably seen before (many times) especially since I'd never seen him before in my life, but I'd sure seen his kind before. I don't even know his name. A total mystery to me. For the sake of providing name recognition in this article, I'll just call him "Thug."

Amazing how he sure seemed to know whom I was, Ah, but what the hell. You ever get that feeling where you're being watched?

Like, all week!? <G>

I looked back to Houghton who was giving my new best friend "Thug" a wave off like the landing signal officer on the H.M.S. Pinafore, and I just continued to listen to Houghton as he whipped out his speech. An amazing speech folks. One that he had obviously prepared over a period of days just waiting to drop it on me at the right moment.

Took at least four guys to back him up and make the moment right, but that's the case with most RARA Awards Banquets...and most bar fights, too.

Here was the Prince of Ethics lecturing me on Journalistic Ethics and how he knew what reporters did and didn't do, and how I was "not a Reporter." This was on the evening of September 14, 2003. Sixteen days earlier Houghton was lying to me in his office that:

...though on July 23, 2003, Houghton had personally signed a letter informing John Parker that:

Folks, Houghton is essentially a "Public Relations/Marketing" individual. For the record, a Public Relations/Marketing "individual" lecturing a Journalist on Journalistic Ethics is tantamount to the Devil lecturing the Pope that "you should come to church more often!"

Now, here's what I loved most about his speech. Mike Houghton called me a liar! Houghton said I was "here covering this event" when I said I wouldn't be. He also indicated that I was "lying" to my "readers."

"Oh, Mr. Kettle! Mr. Pot on line two!"

SSNS Editor was told by Houghton the week before: "You're not an Attorney!" Now told "You're not a Reporter!"

"Reporter's" resume apparently written in disappearing ink! Same ink to be used to invite him to next year's "Invitational!" <G>

("Damn! And all this time, I thought my eyes were going bad!" -- SSNS Editor)

Actually, it's pretty damned funny when you think about it, because right afterwards, Houghton says: "I don't respect that!"

Takes four guys like "Thug" to back him in saying that, minimum. He's got that weird fucking headset on at the time, too...you know, the one where you can listen to people transmitting from another location and talk into a little microphone for them to hear you in return. There's even a little wind cover on the microphone to protect from wind blast -- and of course, we're in a hangar and the wind isn't blowing anyhow. At least, not outside the hangar.

I mean, it was so cool! Houghton looked just like the Material Girl herself (Madonna), on stage during one of her acts with the headset and the little microphone and four shirtless guys backing her while she's doing Karaoke and dancing around scantily clothed. As for how Houghton was dressed, well, as usual, I brought my 330 pound-ass to this little suareé dressed in t-shirt, sweats, and baseball cap (purchased from the Reno National Championship Air Races, no less...) so, I probably shouldn't make jokes about plaid shirts, slacks nor conical bras.

I mean, a slick, lying Public Relations individual, dressed in a headset and microphone while standing in a crowded room/hangar/barn, lecturing a journalist on journalistic ethics with four "Thugs" backing him up is pretty funny in itself, so there are just roads you don't need to go down, even when you digress! <G>

Just the same, the "pretty pretty boys that she calls 'menz'..." (Editorial Note: From The Eagles: "Hotel California") in the background was an interesting effect! <G> I didn't know those kind of guys could speak full sentences like: "Why don't you get the fuck out of here!!??"

Kudos to Houghton for teaching "Thug" full sentences! Double kudos to "Thug" for being able not only to handle their complexity, but to insert an expletive on the fly, menace simultaneously, deliver his one line, take a wave off from the Material Girl in her headset and plaid shirt like "Backoff! You're stealing my spotlight!" And to show no facial emotion of any kind while being choked to death by your master's leash, that shows just incredible ability!

BRAVO, "Thug!" No! Wait! Stop the Presses! (sound of applause -- stops suddenly -- sound of computer power supply unit doing the "dying cockroach." Whoops...router burns out...three days later, I'm back to writing this Editorial that should have been ready on Tuesday! <G>)

"Rah! Rah! Thug!"

Yeah, that's pretty much how I picture "Thug." Running around Reno-Stead Airport like "An-i-mal" from the Muppets, excitedly checking out the aerial activity around the garbage cans (there is an Air Race on you know...and "Thug" likes things with wings plus, Oscar the Grouch is one of his best friends, as you also know well...); "Thug" repeatedly uttering the words "Rah Rah Rah Rah Rah Rah" excitedly before walking into a static propeller, banging the shit out of his head, waking up on the ground with people staring at him like: "What a moron!," watching little P-51s circling his head in some kind of Silver Race spectacular, pointing up to them with one finger while clasping his hand to his ouchy with the other, and calling non-existent Pylon Cuts on the one with the lime green wings while the others fly through one ear and out the other.

So, let's tally this up:

• I'm "not a Reporter"

I'm "lying" to my readers (his words)

• Mike Houghton doesn't respect Journalists who lie to their readers
• Mike Houghton respects himself for lying to me, and therefore my readers
• I was actually being lectured by an asshole wearing a headset and a plaid shirt in a crowded room
• "Thug" can speak full sentences with fluid expletives

Now, I'm sorry, but I have to do this to keep track of things. I had a mild stroke in '98! Others are hoping I have a HUGE stroke in the next five minutes. Since we all know that's not going to happen <G>, we're just going to have to take these little breaks to tally things up! Very important! Let's be fair:

1) Mike will not go anywhere without his headset. 2) "Thug" will not speak full sentences unless he's allowed to use expletives (actually, the same often applies to me, too...<G>). 3) I will not write long Editorials unless I can tally things up in-between.

Yes, I just made that last rule up because I've never done these tallies before, but just like "Cigarettes and Whiskey and Wild, Wild Women," I've got to figure it's never too late to start!

Yes, Virginia, even 330 pound men wearing "sweats" (the "uniform of the depressed") still have reason to hope. But again, I digress...

Oh, I forgot to mention: Mike Houghton thinks I'm hypocritical. Hmmmm. Let me think about that one for a moment:

AHH!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Thank you.

Mike Houghton thinking that "anyone" -- other than he, of course -- is hypocritical, is sort of like the builders of the Titanic blaming the passengers for making that event a disaster by "copping out and drowning!" Forget the fact that most of the 1,500 plus people were overtaken by hypothermia in about ten minutes. The guy who built the Titanic and whom jumped into the lifeboat dressed as a woman said they were all hypocrites!

Mike obviously felt the same way. Here's why:

Mike was furious. Mike was enraged. Mike had been driving fast all week on the ramp (Angry Driver's Syndrome). Mike was furious and enraged while wearing a headset and a plaid shirt. Mike may have been looking for a good time. Most folks think that hanging around with an older man in a headset and plaid shirt is not their idea of a good time, other than four guys, one of whom could speak a complete sentence. Mike had therefore found his good time. Mike was making a speech in front of four guys, only one of whom could speak a full sentence and then, after that, it was "Rah Rah Rah Rah!" Mike is incredibly sick of "Rah Rah!" If Mike, in that moment, heard the words "Rah Rah!" one more time, he was going to go "Postal," only Mike is different...it takes four guys like "Thug" to help Mike go "Postal!" So, Mike simultaneously needs "Rah Rah" while he must endure "Rah Rah" just the same.

Did you get all that!? <G>

Mike was clearly wanting to find some relief, as well as something, anything, on a guy who had caught Mike in a lie some two weeks earlier and here was his chance!

Oh, those billboards were so right! "It" was really hitting the fan at Reno in 2003! "It's" just that, no one knew what "it" was...

So, I'm going to tell you what "it" was. In a word: Desperation.

Mike Houghton to the Editor of Silver State News Service: "You're not a reporter!"

Editor of Silver State News Service: "That's okay! You're not an Air Race!"

Oh my God! The fan was just covered in "it!" Poor "Thug" was covered in "it!" The three guys standing behind Mike were most assuredly covered in "it!" I couldn't see their faces!

Mike exploded as only Mike can! Very mildly. "You called our Air Race a 'piece of shit.' I think you had better leave. I think it's time for you to leave now."

Continued...Page 1